Assalamualaikum ja, this is a letter especially for you. I've known you for about 3 years since Diploma and frankly, I don't know much about you. Whatever it is, getting to be friends with such a smart girl like you is really a blast. We did drift apart after semester 1 of Diploma; but we stayed connected. I am a kiasu, I don't really like it when someone else is better than I am in almost every subject. However, you stayed humble through my arrogance and Kiasu-ness.
We had our ups and downs throughout Diploma; you were the one I met who became my friend before anyone else did. I remembered when you approached me during semester 1, we became close for awhile, walking together to classes, eating together, heck we even spent Ramadhan together going to bazaar's and stuff.
I'm sorry that we drifted apart because I was such a Kiasu; chasing grades as if it were my life that I forgot about our friendship. You always gave me good advices, even though it hurts a lot. Whatever you said really stab me in the heart but it also opened my eyes and my mind. I am still the girl with low self confidence, low self esteem and I can never beat that power of will and confidence that you have. We still got the offer to pursue our degree in the same campus and I was absolutely glad to know that you got the same spot even though we got different courses; but I'm still not sure whether I'll be going and this might be the last chance to meet you.
This is cheesy, I know.
Hoping that I can make the right decisions; I just want to say Thank you for everything. The competition, the friendship, the love and the advice. You are my friend and will always be my friend. I'm sorry for all the troubles I've caused you and I'm sorry for not being able to say it in person.
All the best in life! Nur Hajar Ahmad, you can do it!
Sunday, 1 February 2015
Saturday, 31 January 2015
New life? New journey towards Degree. Take it or leave it. (Bachelor in Corporate Administration)
Assalamualaikum, hi everyone. I totally forgot about this blog of mind. It has been years since I wrote in it and I still can't believe that I wrote all those long blogs about those topics of mind. So, today to be exact on the 31/1/2015, I am still on the brink of making decisions on where I should next steer this course of journey of my life. After 3 months of waiting, I just got the offer letter from UiTM for my degree course, Bachelor in Corporate Administration.
I tried to recall on why did I chose this course back then during my final years of Diploma; I guess you can say that I followed my heart without looking back and I ignored my parents thoughts and wishes.
This is partly due to the fact that I am tired of listening to my dad's high hopes of me pursuing in Law day after day and I just can't take it anymore. It's to the point where I just search click and send moment.
Ever since after I got my results for SPM which I only scored 6A's, my dad has encourage and train me to take up law as my course of life and career choice; being a totally naive and introverted person as I am, I just went with his flow and could not care less about my life after high school.
But after years of exhaustion and disappointment, I just got tired of pursuing law. Even during my 3 years of Diploma in UiTM Sarawak I pursued Diploma in Public Administration as it was the closes that I could find having relations with Law as my number one choice university rejected my offer for Law due to the less qualifications to take it. So, indeed my parents and I was disappointed; especially my dad, I mean why wouldn't he be. Right?
I really enjoyed studying during my Diploma years, it was hard making friends as I am not the attachable type of person. It's hard for my batch to get through me as they find me scary because of how I look and dress. I was able to find a close friend till this day, Azizan Syazwani in Semester 4 of Diploma. Pitiful ain't it, I do have friends but there not as close as Jijan and I.
Nevertheless, through all the hardships; I began to start loving the Diploma subjects especially Political Science and ASEAN studies. Those were my favourite two subjects taught by my favourite lecturer, Miss Chai Shin Yi.
Now, I am still on a brink of whether or not I should accept the offer and I have until the 9th of Feb 2015 to decide. Searching and researching, google-ing everything there is to know and learn about this very course from pass seniors. I cannot be fooled of course, I know that I need to stand strong without swaying from the hateful words of other people saying that I cannot do it.
Can I be this person that the words below are referring to?
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